1. How I Learned To Drive takes place throughout the 1960s and 1970s, focusing on the childhood memories of Lil’ Bit beginning in 1962 as told through her adult self in 1979. Lil’ Bit and her Uncle Peck are the two major characters who are in an incestuous, pedophilic relationship in suburban Maryland. Lil’ Bit retells of her experiences as a child in this “relationship”, as well as its eventual end and its impact on her adult life. How I Learned to Drive also covers Lil’ Bit’s relationship with her grandfather, mother, and with herself.
2. The intrusion would be Lil Bit getting accepted to and leaving for college, as the “relationship she has with Uncle Peck ultimately comes to a head after she leaves. His obsessive notes and his proposal eventually force Lil Bit to end whatever they still had. This escalates the dramatic action by revealing what happened to Lil’ Bit and Peck, and Peck’s own death from his alcohol addiction.
3. This is the day that Lil’ Bit tells us about her childhood trauma – being in an abusive relationship with her Uncle Peck.
4. What is the dramatic question that should be answered by the end of the play?
Will Lil’ Bit be able to live and survive (with her seemingly crippling alcoholism)?
Does she see anything wrong with what she does that is like Uncle Peck (sleeping with the high schooler)?
Does Lil Bit’s mother ever find out? Does Aunt Mary ever say thing?
Does Lil Bit have a relationship with any of her family anymore?
5. Exposition that the readers know from the beginning of the play is that Lil Bit and Peck have a “relationship” going on, though the only family member who knows is Aunt Mary. The play revolves around their internal feelings about their “relationship”. Aunt Mary is the only outside perspective we get on Lil Bit and Peck, and she blames Lil Bit more than Peck for the situation they’ve found themselves in. Mary rationalizes Peck’s bad behavior with the fact that he is a World War II veteran, but calls Lil’ Bit “manipulative” and “stealing her husband”, even though she was only eleven years old when it began.
Exposition that a character reveals about themselves that nobody may know is Uncle Peck possibly molesting his nephew B.B. while they are fishing. Peck alludes to a “secret treehouse” where he and B.B. can share a “secret” that he cannot tell anyone else in his family about, and it is never mentioned again outside of this “memory”. The readers can assume that B.B. didn’t tell anyone about it, and possibly even Aunt Mary did not know, because Uncle Peck was not ostracized and Lil’ Bit wasn’t warned by her mother not to hang around him.
6. The most theatrical moment in the play would be Lil’ Bit and Peck’s meeting in the hotel room after she has returned from college, where he pours out his “love” for her and actually tries to propose. Lil’ Bit rejects his proposal, and there is a moment where they lay down together and she almost goes back to him, but she walks away. I think this is important because it is the first real moment of conflict that Lil’ Bit has internally about what she is doing, probably because she could see the situation from an “outside” point of view by leaving for college.
7. List some of the themes of the play.
Control
Manipulation
Misogyny and negative male perceptions of women
Abuse and power struggle
8. Lil’ Bit first wants to be liked in middle and high-school, but is mocked by her female classmates and reduced to just the size of her chest by her male classmates. She feels isolated and cannot understand why that this is all that she can be seen as, and eventually uses her relationship with Uncle Peck to compensate with her isolation from people her own age. She eventually must grow past this, as she has a date for the prom during the “celebration dinner”.
The main want that Lil’ Bit has as a child is that she wants to go to college. Her own background, however, proves to be an obstacle as her grandparents don’t support her needing education when all she will need to do is “lie on her back” for her eventual husband. She wants to be more than her background, and escape her family. After she eventually gets accepted to college, her alcoholism and relationship with Uncle Peck prevent her from succeeding and finishing, as she drops out in 1970. Lil Bit’s alcoholism continues to be a part of her life and eventually are obstacles that prevent her from moving on from her childhood trauma and being able to be more than her background limited her to.
9. The car is the most pervasive image in How I Learned to Drive, with Lil Bit and Peck’s entire relationship being compared to learning to drive and revolving around private drives in the car. Peck’s monologue about driving being “taking control of your own life” is one of the more powerful images, as that is what adult Lil Bit focuses on while she is telling the story. She discusses how she has become an alcoholic and drives drunk, almost crossing into oncoming traffic but somehow “pulling her car” back into the right lane. The car, traditionally, is thought to be this symbol of “freedom” for many Americans, and I think that in some ways, this is true for Lil’ Bit as well. Lil’ Bit initially feels that Peck is the one person who understands her, so drives with him are “freedom” from her misogynistic grandfather and her other family members. However, the car soon becomes a symbol of the restraint that her “relationship” has on her life, with Peck trying to show his “love” for her by buying a new car. Peck, however, is rejected by Lil’ Bit and his failed proposal and meeting and the hotel is the end of their relationship.
The use of music, I think, can also be another image. All of the 1950’s and 1960’s music seems idyllic, but actually has predatory language in the lyrics with older men pining after teenage girls. I think that Lil’ Bit uses these songs to come to terms with her own past, when she initially may have thought nothing was wrong with what happened. She says she doesn’t “blame” Uncle Peck for what happened and she says that she is “moving on”, but I do not think that she really is a “survivor”. She is a depressed alcoholic, who may in fact be suicidal, and cannot function in society. The undercurrent of predation in these seemingly “fun and simple” songs mirrors Lil’ Bit’s own childhood.
10. The most evident family relationship that is examined is technically the one between Lil’ Bit and Uncle Peck, an incestuous and sexually abusive relationship. This relationship grows out of an isolation that Lil’ Bit and Peck both feel from their other family members, with Lil’ Bit left to the misogynistic grandparents’ assumptions that all she needs to know is “how to lie on her back” and a mother who treats her more like a friend than a daughter. Peck’s marriage seems to be falling apart – as he had been excluded from the past few family dinners and holiday celebrations. Oddly enough, this “family isolation” is what first brings these two together.
Another family relationship that is discussed is the relationship of all of the family women together. These discussions are almost always labeled “On Men, Sex, and Women” and involve the connections between Lil Bit, her mother, and her grandmother. These family relationships examine the subjugated place of women in the 1960s, with the grandmother essentially only being a wife and mother, whose husband only references her when talking about sex or cooking. Lil Bit’s mother reveals that she was a teenage mother who tries to teach her daughter about sex – but gets reprimanded by her mother for not making it “scary enough”. These scenes reveal a double standard for men and women, with a pregnant woman held responsible for her “situation”, and saying that a “girl with her skirt up can outrun a man with his pants down”.
2. The intrusion would be Lil Bit getting accepted to and leaving for college, as the “relationship she has with Uncle Peck ultimately comes to a head after she leaves. His obsessive notes and his proposal eventually force Lil Bit to end whatever they still had. This escalates the dramatic action by revealing what happened to Lil’ Bit and Peck, and Peck’s own death from his alcohol addiction.
3. This is the day that Lil’ Bit tells us about her childhood trauma – being in an abusive relationship with her Uncle Peck.
4. What is the dramatic question that should be answered by the end of the play?
5. Exposition that the readers know from the beginning of the play is that Lil Bit and Peck have a “relationship” going on, though the only family member who knows is Aunt Mary. The play revolves around their internal feelings about their “relationship”. Aunt Mary is the only outside perspective we get on Lil Bit and Peck, and she blames Lil Bit more than Peck for the situation they’ve found themselves in. Mary rationalizes Peck’s bad behavior with the fact that he is a World War II veteran, but calls Lil’ Bit “manipulative” and “stealing her husband”, even though she was only eleven years old when it began.
Exposition that a character reveals about themselves that nobody may know is Uncle Peck possibly molesting his nephew B.B. while they are fishing. Peck alludes to a “secret treehouse” where he and B.B. can share a “secret” that he cannot tell anyone else in his family about, and it is never mentioned again outside of this “memory”. The readers can assume that B.B. didn’t tell anyone about it, and possibly even Aunt Mary did not know, because Uncle Peck was not ostracized and Lil’ Bit wasn’t warned by her mother not to hang around him.
6. The most theatrical moment in the play would be Lil’ Bit and Peck’s meeting in the hotel room after she has returned from college, where he pours out his “love” for her and actually tries to propose. Lil’ Bit rejects his proposal, and there is a moment where they lay down together and she almost goes back to him, but she walks away. I think this is important because it is the first real moment of conflict that Lil’ Bit has internally about what she is doing, probably because she could see the situation from an “outside” point of view by leaving for college.
7. List some of the themes of the play.
8. Lil’ Bit first wants to be liked in middle and high-school, but is mocked by her female classmates and reduced to just the size of her chest by her male classmates. She feels isolated and cannot understand why that this is all that she can be seen as, and eventually uses her relationship with Uncle Peck to compensate with her isolation from people her own age. She eventually must grow past this, as she has a date for the prom during the “celebration dinner”.
The main want that Lil’ Bit has as a child is that she wants to go to college. Her own background, however, proves to be an obstacle as her grandparents don’t support her needing education when all she will need to do is “lie on her back” for her eventual husband. She wants to be more than her background, and escape her family. After she eventually gets accepted to college, her alcoholism and relationship with Uncle Peck prevent her from succeeding and finishing, as she drops out in 1970. Lil Bit’s alcoholism continues to be a part of her life and eventually are obstacles that prevent her from moving on from her childhood trauma and being able to be more than her background limited her to.
9. The car is the most pervasive image in How I Learned to Drive, with Lil Bit and Peck’s entire relationship being compared to learning to drive and revolving around private drives in the car. Peck’s monologue about driving being “taking control of your own life” is one of the more powerful images, as that is what adult Lil Bit focuses on while she is telling the story. She discusses how she has become an alcoholic and drives drunk, almost crossing into oncoming traffic but somehow “pulling her car” back into the right lane. The car, traditionally, is thought to be this symbol of “freedom” for many Americans, and I think that in some ways, this is true for Lil’ Bit as well. Lil’ Bit initially feels that Peck is the one person who understands her, so drives with him are “freedom” from her misogynistic grandfather and her other family members. However, the car soon becomes a symbol of the restraint that her “relationship” has on her life, with Peck trying to show his “love” for her by buying a new car. Peck, however, is rejected by Lil’ Bit and his failed proposal and meeting and the hotel is the end of their relationship.
The use of music, I think, can also be another image. All of the 1950’s and 1960’s music seems idyllic, but actually has predatory language in the lyrics with older men pining after teenage girls. I think that Lil’ Bit uses these songs to come to terms with her own past, when she initially may have thought nothing was wrong with what happened. She says she doesn’t “blame” Uncle Peck for what happened and she says that she is “moving on”, but I do not think that she really is a “survivor”. She is a depressed alcoholic, who may in fact be suicidal, and cannot function in society. The undercurrent of predation in these seemingly “fun and simple” songs mirrors Lil’ Bit’s own childhood.
10. The most evident family relationship that is examined is technically the one between Lil’ Bit and Uncle Peck, an incestuous and sexually abusive relationship. This relationship grows out of an isolation that Lil’ Bit and Peck both feel from their other family members, with Lil’ Bit left to the misogynistic grandparents’ assumptions that all she needs to know is “how to lie on her back” and a mother who treats her more like a friend than a daughter. Peck’s marriage seems to be falling apart – as he had been excluded from the past few family dinners and holiday celebrations. Oddly enough, this “family isolation” is what first brings these two together.
Another family relationship that is discussed is the relationship of all of the family women together. These discussions are almost always labeled “On Men, Sex, and Women” and involve the connections between Lil Bit, her mother, and her grandmother. These family relationships examine the subjugated place of women in the 1960s, with the grandmother essentially only being a wife and mother, whose husband only references her when talking about sex or cooking. Lil Bit’s mother reveals that she was a teenage mother who tries to teach her daughter about sex – but gets reprimanded by her mother for not making it “scary enough”. These scenes reveal a double standard for men and women, with a pregnant woman held responsible for her “situation”, and saying that a “girl with her skirt up can outrun a man with his pants down”.